The Death of a Soulful Musician

I get that people have all kinds of reasons for celebrity death mourning, mostly nostalgia? The reminder that that dark entity is approaching us all? Im not really sure, but for me it has to do 100% with musicians. I was in a really bad place in late April, This record kept me sane. Chris Cornell Unplugged in Sweden spoke to every part of me that Cornells many bands Soundgarden, Audioslave,did on occasion. Somehow the stripped down acoustic stuff along with his truly perfect voice has now allowed me to explore a lifetime of music. Before I left the vacation spot, the cold news came out. A hanging, possibly drug related? God man, I wish someone told me, well my Dad did tell me "it never ends well". 

Chris Cornell, I do not idolize people but you making all this amazing music commands more respect then some shit idol.... 

"Come Pull The sheets over my eyes, So I can Sleep tonight, Despite what I've seen today, I found you guilty of the Crime of sleeping at a time when you should have been wide awake"

Insomniac (Eyelashes)

 I lay there, awake next to my wife. My mind will not quiet itself. I think of thousands of things all at once, some pleasant, some disturbing. I keep visualizing the human body which comforts me but I can't hold it. Again and again I reposition myself but nothing works, no comfort tonight. In the back of my head is the thought that my son will be awake early and whatever sleep I might get won't last. Again the human body, some faceless woman poses for me and all I see of her face are eyes forever changing. 

 This is a losing battle. I get up and put my headphones on. I walk out on my balcony and smoke a cigarette. It's cold now in Washington and peacefully mist falls. I think about the fact I am a night person, I always have been. Having my son has been hard on my sleep patterns. It's a rhythm you cannot change. I am most creative at night and most aware, this is when I get things done, while the world sleeps. 

 I strum a few notes on my guitar and put my headphones back on and start writing this. The worst part is, I had so much to say, so much to write but as I sit here I can only think of the eyes I keep seeing when I close mine. The eyelashes. The tiny wrinkles emoting such expression. I can think of the troubling nature of my inner dialogue and the conflicting subjects that are on my mind tonight. Darkness and light. I stop writing and focus on Thom Yorkes voice singing "Present Tense" and an explosion of images release into the space behind my eyes. 

 Soon the sun will come up. Soon the cars will fill the street, but until then I will try and close my eyes one more time.

John Lennon "Plastic Ono Band"

 I am a huge John Lennon fan. I am a fan of him for the fact he was a deeply flawed man who was constantly searching for something. Unlike most music, especially mainstream "Hip Hop", or watered down whatever-the-radio-is-playing-on-a-loop-these-days music, I can relate to Lennon's lyrics. I feel them, I know what he is talking about. John Lennon put out a lot of music. The specific record I am referring to is John Lennon's first record post Beatles, John Lennon "Plastic Ono Band". This is one of the most stripped down, minimalistic, and deeply truthful pieces of art I have ever experienced. I first heard it when I was maybe 8 or 9. Grown up (just a bit?) this record has found me again at the exact time it was supposed to. If you ever want to hear complete honesty in lyrics, this is THE album. Beautifully recorded and in my opinion, there is not one note under or over played. To me what John Lennon, Klaus Voorman, Ringo Starr, and Billy Preston did on this record is genius. A record that from top to bottom has no bad songs. No bad decisions.

Here is the story of making this monumental album. 

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